Meet my mum, Jane Turner.
Isn’t she beautiful?
She doesn’t look like this anymore. The light has gone from her eyes and she doesn’t see us anymore. She can still see, her eyesight is still okay, but her brain no longer shows her what is in front of her. Instead, she sees other things, things we cannot see. Things that exist only in her memory, or her imagination. Or her nightmares.
But, that’s not who Mum was.
My mother was a strong, independent and opinionated lady, before strong and opinionated women were the norm. She had a wicked sense of humour and her family were her life. She found it hard to forgive and carried childhood hurt with her through her life. This affected her self confidence and self belief and was one of the major factors in us all thinking (and hoping) that the early signs of her dementia were depression that linked back to these deep-rooted feelings.
She was a dancer and taught Ballroom and Latin dancing up until a year or so before her diagnosis. It is a major regret in my life that I never asked my mum to teach me how to dance. Now it is too late. Now my aim is to get on to Strictly Come Dancing and learn how to jive and waltz on there instead. I want to do it for Mum and all those other families struggling with dementia, raising awareness and making a difference…. Oh, and I’m going to win the glitter-ball trophy. For Mum. Just saying!
Mum took herself off to college when I was a teenager and trained as a chef. She then set up her own catering business and was hugely successful for a number of years doing the business lunches at Nat West Bank and private parties and functions around Yorkshire.
I am one of three siblings. My elder brother and younger sister miss her as much as I do. She was our biggest fan. Our biggest and loudest critic and also our fiercest protector.
She has 8 grandchildren. She has met them all, though was already lost to us by the time, Annie, the youngest was born. She will live on through them and through the stories we will tell them about their granny, as they grow up.
She will also live on through my blog.
Thanks for reading.
I miss you, Mum. x