“The time has come, the Walrus said…”

By my dad….

I read an article from the Times recently on one of Jane’s favourite bands, Fleetwood Mac. Lindsey Buckingham and Christine McVie have recently recorded a duets album together. Christine made a surprise return to the band in 2013 after a 15 year absence and Jane and I saw the full (all five) group playing in Glasgow over 2 years ago. Great fun, although she doesn’t really remember those good times now.

I recall one song “Tusk” which was a great hit for them. We put “Tango in the night” CD on fairly regularly now as I think music does help her settle and she often sings along (although not so much now).

As I sit here in the spring sunshine I smile and Tusk of course reminds me of Lewis Carroll’s “The Walrus and the Carpenter” (Alice through the Looking Glass – 1872).
It goes like this :

The time has come the Walrus said
To talk of many things
of shoes – and ships – and sealing wax
of cabbages and kings
And why the sea is boiling hot
and whether pigs have wings

(now a slight variation by s.r.t.)

But wait a bit old Stevie cried
before we have our chat
We should perhaps think carefully
about the future of this and that
The time has come we all believe
to shout out loud “howzat”.

The bails are down, it’s a crying shame
to send dear Jane away
but she’ll be safe added the Walrus
and looked after day by day
by nursing staff and those who help
in their own most kindest way.

She’ll be content, fed and watered
and make friends you know
Please don’t cry my dear friend
it’s best for her and you – and so
pack the bags – and shoes – and make up too
then the sun will shine with sky so blue.

The Carpenter thought he would say a word
as of course is his right
He agreed that your love will be just fine
in fact – he then added – you might
find your life is much better
to know she’ll be cared for day and night.

Over 40 years of family life and fun
now will soon come to an end
But do not fret all Turner clan, life’s not done
and happy memories live on
So we’ll visit you often and hold your hand
And whisper “you’ll always be our Mum”.

lewis carroll
Yes indeed after a weeks respite care in a local nursing home she has come home more confused than ever I believe. Conversation is very difficult and she seems lost more than ever. She is now slightly aggressive towards home care who come in morning and night. I have to help them on most days. Her illness is now affecting her to such an extent that I now feel 24 hour help is needed. I find it quite distressing now to see her decline so much.

Sarah has done wonderfully well writing her thoughts down in her blog. It has helped her and those who keep up with her typed words. All our children are fantastic and caring and keep in touch regularly. I love them all and the 8 (yes eight) grandchildren !

I miss you darling.

mum 6

8 thoughts on ““The time has come, the Walrus said…”

  1. I will always have the great memories of Jane on the school trips that we shared. A lovely Lady. My heart goes out to the Turner clan.

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    1. Hi Zena,
      Thank you for your kind words – apologies for the delay in picking up your comment, it’s been a chaotic few months. I hope you are all well?
      Lots of love to you all
      Sarah x

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  2. What a beautiful but bitter sweet poem. My father is not yet at this point! but we know the day will come soon enough.

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  3. Dear Stephen and Family, such a difficult decision, such poignant words, such a beautiful, strong lady, wife and mother, who will always have lots of love and good care. Amazing words so loving, so sad. Amanda and Phillip

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  4. bitter yet sweet – thoughts are with Steven, Jane and all the family – hard to do but deep down inside you know its the right thing for Jane. in my thoughts
    April (Vancouver Ave)

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